Seven years ago, I lost my father. It was an unexpected death. He was sick and had trouble breathing. The doctors thought it was pneumonia. Turns out he had a pulmonary embolism. Two days before he passed he called me scared. He told me that he wanted me to know that he loved me and my brother more than anything in the world. He didn’t want to die without me or Daniel knowing this. I didn’t realize how serious his condition was (he was slightly melodramatic.) I told him that we both knew that he loved us and that if it was his time to go, to go peacefully knowing that. Little did I know, that 2 nights later he would pass in an ambulance on the way to the hospital gasping for air.
When emptying out my father’s home a couple of months later, I found a cassette player. To my surprise there was a tape in it. On this tape was my father’s beautiful voice singing. I have listened to this tape one time since it just put me into a downward spiral of grief. I was extremely close to my dad and hearing his voice but not being able to see him just pierced my heart. I don’t know why he recorded himself singing. It’s not something I remember him doing before but I am so glad that he did. It’s a connection that I still have to him.
Tomorrow would have been his 61st birthday. Happy Birthday Daddy. I can’t wait to see you again.
Now head over to Christa Paustenbaugh in Manassas, VA to see the music in her life.
El - OMG….. this brought tears to my eyes…. what a precious gift to have found. Love love love this photo & this post. I hope at some stage in the future you will be able to listen to the tape without being crushed by grief.
kedwards - Thank you El. I will listen to it again. I want to play it for my children so they can hear the lovely voice of their Pop-Pop despite the fact they never met him.
Summer - Not only is the story beautifully told but your image is creative and different! Gorgeous!
Erin - Thank you for sharing this story, and love the angle you chose for your image. What a blessing to have found that precious treasure! I’m sure your children will be happy to hear it someday.
Christa P. - What an amazing gift to have from your father. Beautiful image too!
amy - oh kimberlee. I have chills! What a great story to go along with your tape. I am so sorry that you lost your dad so soon, but so thankful that you have this tape to always remember her voice. I will keep hounding you to get this onto something more permanent. You need to pass this to your kids too. I think your photo is perfect!
Cathy K - As I sit here with tears falling down my cheeks, I can’t help but think how lucky you are to have tape. I hope in time you will able to listen to that without feeling more sadness. What I wouldn’t give to be able to hear my mom’s voice again….
Faye - Wow – what an amazing story behind this. You are so fortunate to have this as an everlasting memory of your Dad. I can only imagine how painful it must be to hear his voice and not be able to see him. Hopefully in time, you can listen to it again, and treasure this amazing memory you have
Genevieve Flynn - Wow, what an amazing story, and how wonderful it is that you found that tape. It must have been painful but I’m sure you see what a treasure it is now. Technology is truly a wonderful thing. (The shot is gorgeous too btw, great angle and macro).